Lucie sits here thinking
Her thoughts race
Smells of food linger
From the day room
She begins to pace,
Her body trying to escape
Her mind
Her cluttered mind
Full of chaos and fog
She tidies her room
An attempt to gain control
Everything in it’s place
Everything has it’s home
But still chaotic thoughts will roam
‘How many drinks have I had today?’
Were they hot or cold?
Was it an even amount of each
Too many niceties she scolds She paces, agitation increasing
What have I eaten?
What have I consumed
She has eaten nothing
But thoughts of hunger trick her mind
Full on junk food thoughts
She counts them up,
thoughts of hunger must surely increase her size
No sleep for the greedy
There will be punishment tonight
She hits her head on the wall
Too much confusion
Obsession in her mind
‘ too much too much
She feels too heavy
She takes up too much space
She doesn’t deserve help
She doesn’t deserve to live
STOP
I shout at myself
I have had enough of this
I sit on my bed quietly
Focus my mind
Chanting ’I do deserve to eat’
This poem was written about the anxiety that I felt after eating
My Poetry
